Curiousity: the ultimate problem solver

A recent LinkedIn post by a fellow marketing exec, Jo Ann Herold, got me thinking about the best advice I have ever received.

I have been blessed with many wise mentors, coaches, and peers from whom I have learned. It is hard to pick just one piece of advice. That said, one did stand out.

Ask more questions

Maybe like you, I am a time-starved, experienced, and opinionated person who makes their living solving problems, anticipating problems, and rallying others to do the same. So, I am quick with answers. But I have learned (or am learning, to be more accurate) that more is accomplished with questions. Through questioning, root cause can really be established, customer needs can be fully understood, the talent of team members can be brought to bear, and alignment occurs more naturally. Asking “why?” five times is the staple of lean thinking and there is magic in asking questions. As a communicator-at-heart, my tendency to tell or sell can get in my way. I know I am not alone.

The other reason that asking questions is powerful is that there are more things to know than I will ever know. Others have forgotten more about subjects that I don’t know anything about. The pace of innovation, information sharing, and interconnections between us is growing so fast that the only skill or knowledge that any of us can hold for any length of time is the ability to learn and be curious.

I have a sticker on my laptop that says “Ask More Questions” (which my son picked up for me at an Alpha class he attended and thought I would like). It is a good reminder that I could heed more often.

Mission: Impossible and Sales and Marketing Alignment

I saw the new Mission: Impossible movie yesterday and was struck by how often Ethan Hunt, the hero played by Tom Cruise, stopped to see, empathize, and protect his team mates and the innocent bystanders of his action shenanigans. Seeing them as people, not as obstacles on his parkour course chasing bad guys.

It was a good reinforcement of some ideas from a book (recommended to me by Jennifer Daniels) called The Anatomy of Peace by the Arbinger Institute. In it, they provocatively call the objectifying of people as an act of violence itself, as thoughts precede behavior. 

What does this have to do with sales and marketing alignment? Well, everything.

I have been writing for Forbes on the topic of alignment and customer-centricity, showcasing insights from different marketing, sales, and business leaders across the country, from brands big and small. I still have a lot to share (stay tuned for some great upcoming pieces), but even in these early weeks of my research I am struck with how often the problem that manifests as misalignment is one of perspective.

Harkening back to high school geometry, here is the step-by-step proof:

We can only solve problems we can see.

In frustration or impatience, we see each other as the problem.

When we see each other as the problem, we stop seeing the real problem.

As we don't see the problem as it truly is, we can never really solve it.

In a lesson today, Dr. Mark Brewer, reminded us that in relationships you can’t think “you are the problem” or “I am the problem,” you have to think “it’s you and me against the problem.”

When we see each other through the lens (or should I say the monocle) of the problem, we no longer see the person. They are the problem. They are objectified.  They are a caricature without the complexities inherent in humanity. We see them and the issue in 2D. Over-simplified. And as a result, our minds are tuned to seek and find hardship. We are often chasing evidence of how we’ve been wronged. None of which is useful to problem solving.

In contrast, when we see the problem through the lenses of more than one expert (as you can when you are on the same side of the table, instead of opposite sides), the problem can be fully explored in 3D. The people remain people (not obstacles to overcome) and our minds are tuned to solutions and finding common ground. 

We see what we seek.

This does not mean that sometimes our colleagues are not very good at their jobs or that some people are difficult to work alongside. There are times when people do have ill intensions or have broken our trust. Sometimes role changes or people moves are required to get to solution and this can be achieved with sensitivity and respect.  But in any case, confronting reality, both the good and the bad, together leads to better outcomes in my experience.

I heard of an example recently where a high-performing executive at a prominent company decided to take a side step into a supporting role in recognition that the business needed something beyond what he could give. This highly admirable act demonstrates not only self-awareness and servant leadership, but also the commitment to face the truth and follow that truth to whatever conclusions are best for the business. 

This kind of openness and frank communication can re-center the organization on the “why” of your business or project, what success looks like, and what is required to move forward.

Ray Padron recently shared a quote from Gail Hyatt which posed that “people lose their way, when they lose their why.” So true.

And ironically, the best way to find your “why” is to start with your “who.” After all, you can’t be obsessed about your customers, if you don’t know who they are. You can’t set priorities or align your time and resources to high-impact projects, if you don’t know who you are serving. You can't own your business, if you are seeking others to blame. And we can’t determine or achieve the “why” of our business without the people “who” are our colleagues, team mates, stakeholders, and co-collaborators.

Our mission, should we accept it, is to see people as people and to find a way together.

This article was originally published on LinkedIn Pulse.

What kind of team are we?

Everyone loves to talk about teamwork.  Consults will consult.  Writers will write.  Leaders will lead.  And all of them are obsessed with teamwork.

But recently, I was watching my daughter’s track meet and thought about all the different types of teams that exist.  Each one requiring different types of teamwork.  We often don’t think about that in a work environment, even though we see examples of all of these in our workplaces.

Basketball (or soccer or football):  In this team sport, each player has a role, plays that they run, and they are constantly communicating to react successfully to new competitive conditions.  They share a common time clock, a common score board, a common uniform, a common coach, and are all playing the same game.  They are all striving to make or assist with the making of points.  The work group is an example of this kind of team.  Coming together, each representing a role or a strength, to collaborative work on a single deliverable, project, or document.   The key to results of this kind of team is aptitude and attitude.  If the individuals know their own strengths and weaknesses, and that of their teammates and can work selflessly towards the team goal, then greatness can be achieved.

Relay: In a relay team, each player has a role, but they don’t play them at the same time.  They, too, are constantly communicating, but only to assure successful hand-offs.  They share a common time clock, score board, and possibly a common uniform.  Each person on the team is running, but they are placed in position because of their relative strengths and speed.  They are dividing and conquering a larger task (in this case, a race) by breaking it into individual pieces.  A service escalation is this kind of team.  The first leg might be done by a customer service agent on the phone.  Then the problem is escalated to a technician, to a service manager, and then to an engineer.  Throughout, there is a common time clock and a common goal of customer issue resolution.  Everyone is doing similar jobs, but are doing it in their own way.  The key to achievement with this team is individual competence and the game is won or lost at the hand-offs.

Track and Field: The larger team, of which a relay is a part, is a loose affiliate of people who are all performing in tandem to rack up points for their overall team.  They are all in the same location (the track meet) and subject to the same environmental conditions and priorities.  Yet, they are all doing their own things.  Often in tandem (with field events happening the same time as running events).  Often together (as is the case with the relay team).  But each person is an individual contributor doing their best, which results in team achievement.  But you can’t ask a pole vaulter to anchor the 4 x 100 relay team and you can’t ask the person doing the 3,000 meters to throw the shot put.  A product launch is an example of this.  Web site content and brochures can’t be written until the messaging is complete, but that is often done by a different group.  Messaging benefits from a thorough understanding of features and benefits.  Features can’t be known until the engineering finalizes the design.  And those features can’t be determined or prioritized without market requirements.  Together these can show customers why the product is a winner, but each step of the process is quite unique and not interchangeable.  The key to achievement with this team is getting individuals to perform their best.

There are many other types of teams that can follow these and other patterns.  Debate teams work a bit like the relay and a track and field team.  Choirs are like relays in many ways, as the blending and the music reading is like the hand-offs.  Cleaning and painting crews can be more like a basketball team.  Kitchen staff or wait staff in restaurants can mimic all of these at times.  The key to any type of teamwork is for the group to first recognize what kind of teamwork is required.

5 Ways to Tame the Animals You Work With

A lot has been written about biomimicry and the inspiration that product designers get from studying nature — the skeletal structure of a flying squirrel informing the design of drones or the layered butterfly wing to help create optical coatings for displays. And I’ve been thinking about how interpersonal relationships also mimic the natural world. Some days, especially stressful ones, I am reminded that we are all animals and need to find ways to work with animals.

Below are five common animal defense systems that I’ve seen demonstrated in the workplace (and, certainly, in myself) that might help us tame our instincts (which have both benefits and cause problems) and our environments. By better understanding ourselves and each other, we can better react to perceived threats and leverage our natural abilities to overcome conflicts and work better as a team.

Cobra: When threatened, the snake rises up and make itself look bigger to scare away would-be predators. In our relationships, this shows up as verbal defensiveness. In a business setting, people who mimic cobras often change their posture stand and speak loudly to exude confidence, and often interrupt others. Their emphatic statements might be so persuasive they parade as facts. At their best, they provide passion, clarity and a sense of mission to their team. At their worst, they can be bullies or manipulators. They do all of this in order to put the idea forward more aggressively when others object, and can become dogmatic.

If you are a cobra:   When you feel like you need to be bigger, louder, or more aggressive, consider instead the power of gentle persuasion and the need to listen completely to the other side before reacting out of impulse. I must admit that I have cobra tendencies and would be served by choosing not to react, but rather to respond thoughtfully when under pressure.

If you are working with a cobra: As a cobra, I respond well when teammates push back with new data points and different perspectives. I would encourage colleagues not to let the scary hood or confidence dissuade them from presenting an alternative views. Cobras can be poor (or incomplete) listeners and need people to tell them the truth and help them refine their gut feelings (which trigger the defense mechanism) to help others see their perspective without feeling threatened.

Turtle: The turtle has been immortalized in folk tales as a slow-moving, methodical animal. An animal who wears his defense mechanism on his sleeve, literally. When threatened, the plodding animal gives up any forward progress, to recess into his shell and hide until the threat has passed. I have seen this pattern many times in my colleagues or team mates, a slow-and-steady person, who only agreed to change on a step-by-step basis and will retreat into their shells until everyone can just agree and get along. As turtles don’t need facts to retreat into their shells, they might not even be able to articulate in words what threat is perceived and what might result from the threat. At their best, they provide a comprehensive, well thought out plan and long term direction. At their worst, turtles procrastinate deadlines and decisions, which stalls progress and can delay results.

If you are a turtle: When you feel the temptation to retreat, assess the real threat. Consider the consequences of the worst case scenario and the benefits and drawbacks of making a change. Consider talking to someone who has a bolder approach for their advice. The goal is to determine if there is a way to step out of your comfort zone and start the changing process, or if the threats must be resolved before you leave your shell.

If you are working with a turtle: I have found communication to be key to effectively team with a turtle. It is important to be proactive with the turtle before the defense mechanism is triggered by a complaint or concern. Break down the larger projects and priorities into their pieces, showing the step-by-step processes and how to mitigate risk along the way. Clearly outline roles, responsibilities and decision makers so the turtle knows who to connect with if questions and or suggestions arise.

Electric Eel: The electric eel is ready with 600 volts of electricity to dole out to any would-be predator. There is no negotiation or posturing. There is no hiding. There is only attack. I have certainly worked with many eels. Eels are sharp — armed with data, analysis, and opinion, the eel can unload on anyone who disagrees with them with a current of logical arguments and justifications. They can have a tendency to belittle others, leaving them writhing on the ground after an encounter. At their best, eels are knowledgeable and persuasive. At their worst, they use the threat of retaliation as a deterrent to keep people from disagreeing with them, often unwittingly. Gliding along in their own “everyone agrees with me world,” they may not know that people are not being honest with them or alerting them to potential issues.

If you are an eel: I would encourage you to balance your initial approach with a committed desire for long-term relationship. Think about the person, not just the power you have. You might win the argument with a co-worker and force others into submission, but that isn’t good teamwork. Remember that the focus of your energy should be positive encouragement, not disparaging comments. Make sure you wield data, not shame.

If you work with an eel: Make sure you do your homework. Know your stuff and be prepared for a sting. Dig into the data with them, which might help get the eel on the same side of the negotiating table with you, rather than see themselves in an adversarial role.  And if you get stung, there are several approaches to take, but the one that will lead to the most respect is to stand up for yourself. It may be extremely hard, but the bravery it takes to say “that’s not okay” and “here is how you should have responded,” can take the amperage out and put you back at a power parity with your eel colleague.

Sea Cucumber: This very strange animal has an unusual defense mechanism: it surrenders. The highly pliable organism can break itself into pieces, sacrificing body parts (including organs) to a predator until the predator is preoccupied and the sea cucumber (or what is left of it) can get way. It wants to end the conflict as soon as possible and retreat to where it can heal. In the workplace, these are often the soft spoken colleagues who are less likely to take a contrary (and never a combative) view with the group. They are eager to please and just want everyone to get along and mind their own. The problem with this approach is that their valuable perspectives are never shared, which does harm the team and empowers more aggressive colleagues. At their best, their empathy and willingness to pitch in can help the team complete tasks. At their worst, they can be an easy target and take the brunt of bullying.

If you are a sea cucumber: Think about how you can best engage and give your ideas without having to sacrifice yourself. Have confidence that the team deserves your participation. Also, consider that the relative costs of speaking up in the moment is more effective and valuable than having to nurse wounds or regrow body parts later.

If you work with a sea cucumber: I find speaking with reclusive teammates is most beneficial in a 1:1 or smaller setting. If I see that a colleague has taken a brunt of tension-filled meeting and not spoken up, I try to draw them out of their tendency of self-sacrifice to encourage them communicate their ideas and perspectives.

Grizzly Bears: One of the few animals with no natural-born predators, I think we can all learn from the grizzly bears to be a more effective team. Unarmed, even a clever human can’t beat the bear. She doesn’t have to inflict, hide in the woods, or rise up to scare away people to stay alive, because she is capable of all of those things. She doesn’t have to be defensive, because she has power.

By recognizing our own characteristics, we can combine our natural strengths to harness the confidence of the cobra, the thoughtfulness of the turtle, the healing powers of the sea cucumber, and the knowledge of the eel. By leveraging our defensive tendencies into powerful tools, we can be a team of grizzly bears — working together to influence others, to excite change, to achieve greatness. 

The work of taming your environment begins with taming yourself. Recognizing your own tendencies and looking for ways to soften your bite or stand your ground might make all the difference. It’s a lesson we are all learning and adaptations we are all making in our effort to team better.

This article was published on LinkedIn Pulse.  

Go Together

"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together." -African Proverb

Biomimicry In Teamwork

A lot has been written about biomimicry and the inspiration that product designers get from studying nature — the skeletal structure of a flying squirrel informing the design of drones or the layered butterfly wing to help create optical coatings for displays.  But I have recently been thinking about how interpersonal relationships also mimic the animal world (beyond the fact that homo sapiens are technically animals).  In our business relationships, especially in our teamwork where conflict is common, how do we resemble members of the animal kingdom?  Specifically, I’ve identified the five most common animal defense systems that I’ve seen in the workplace (including my own) to help identify defense triggers. By better understanding ourselves and each other, we can better react to perceived threats and leverage our natural abilities to overcome conflicts and work better as a team.

I’ll start with the disclaimer that these animal analogies are not flattering. Just like the circumstances in the wild that trigger defense mechanisms, life and teamwork can be messy.  They are meant to elicit some introspection and a renewed commitment to conflict resolution so each team member can bring their strengths and work together.

Cobra: I recognize that I often act as a cobra. This snake is well known for the flare up — when threatened, it can rise up and make itself look bigger to scare away would-be predators.  In our relationships, this shows up as verbal defensiveness and a posture change.  In a business setting, people who mimic cobras often change their posture stand and speak loudly to exude confidence, and often interrupt others.  Their emphatic statements might be so persuasive they parade as facts.  At their best, they provide passion, clarity and a sense of mission to their team.  At their worst, they can be bullies or manipulators.  They do all of this in order to put the idea forward more aggressively when others object, and can become dogmatic.

If you are a cobra:    When you feel like you need to be bigger, louder, or more aggressive, consider instead the power of gentle persuasion and the need to listen completely to the other side before reacting out of impulse.

If you are working with a cobra: As a cobra, I respond well when teammates push back with new data points and different perspectives. I would encourage colleagues not to let the scary hood or confidence dissuade them from presenting an alternative views.  Cobras can be poor (or incomplete) listeners and need people to tell them the truth and help them refine their gut feelings (which trigger the defense mechanism) to help others see their perspective without feeling threatened.

Turtle:  The turtle has been immortalized in folk tales as a slow-moving, methodical animal.  An animal who wears his defense mechanism on his sleeve, literally.  When threatened, the plodding animal gives up any forward progress, to recess into his shell and hide until the threat has passed.  I have seen this pattern many times in my colleagues or team mates, a slow-and-steady person, who only agreed to change on a step-by-step basis and will retreat into their shells until everyone can just agree and get along.  As turtles don’t need facts to retreat into their shells, they might not even be able to articulate in words what threat is perceived and what might result from the threat.  At their best, they provide a comprehensive, well thought out plan and long term direction.  At their worst, turtles procrastinate deadlines and decisions, which stalls progress and can delay results.

If you are a turtle: When you feel the temptation to retreat, assess the real threat. Consider the consequences of the worst case scenario and the benefits and drawbacks of making a change. Consider talking to someone who has a bolder approach for their advice.  The goal is to determine if there is a way to step out of your comfort zone and start the changing process, or if the threats must be resolved before you leave your shell.

If you are working with a turtle: I have found communication to be key to effectively team with a turtle.  It is important to be proactive with the turtle before the defense mechanism is triggered by a complaint or concern. Break down the larger projects and priorities into their pieces, showing the step-by-step processes and how to mitigate risk along the way. Clearly outline roles, responsibilities and decision makers so the turtle knows who to connect with if questions and or suggestions arise.

Electric Eel:  The electric eel is ready with 600 volts of electricity to dole out to any would-be predator.  There is no negotiation or posturing.  There is no hiding.  There is only attack.  I have certainly worked with many eels.  Eels are sharp — armed with data, analysis, and opinion, the eel can unload on anyone who disagrees with them with a current of logical arguments and justifications.  They can have a tendency to belittle others, leaving them writhing on the ground after an encounter.  At their best, eels are knowledgeable and persuasive. At their worst, they use the threat of retaliation as a deterrent to keep people from disagreeing with them, often unwittingly.  Gliding along in their own “everyone agrees with me world,” they may not know that people are not being honest with them or alerting them to potential issues.

If you are an eel: I would encourage you to balance your initial approach with a committed desire for long-term relationship.  Think about the person, not just the power you have.  You might win the argument with a co-worker and force others into submission, but that isn’t good teamwork.  Remember that the focus of your energy should be positive encouragement, not disparaging comments.  Make sure you wield data, not shame.

If you work with an eel: Make sure you do your homework.  Know your stuff and be prepared for a sting.  Dig into the data with them, which might help get the eel on the same side of the negotiating table with you, rather than see themselves in an adversarial role.   And if you get stung, there are several approaches to take, but the one that will lead to the most respect is to stand up for yourself.  It may be extremely hard, but the bravery it takes to say “that’s not okay” and “here is how you should have responded,” can take the amperage out and put you back at a power parity with your eel colleague.

Sea Cucumber:  This very strange animal has an unusual defense mechanism: it surrenders.  The highly pliable organism can break itself into pieces, sacrificing body parts (including organs) to a predator until the predator is preoccupied and the sea cucumber (or what is left of it) can get way.  It wants to end the conflict as soon as possible and retreat to where it can heal.  In the workplace, these are often the soft spoken colleagues who are less likely to take a contrary (and never a combative) view with the group.  They are eager to please and just want everyone to get along and mind their own.  The problem with this approach is that their valuable perspectives are never shared, which does harm the team and empowers more aggressive colleagues. At their best, their empathy and willingness to pitch in can help the team complete tasks. At their worst, they can be an easy target and take the brunt of bullying.

If you are a sea cucumber: Think about how you can best engage and give your ideas without having to sacrifice yourself. Have confidence that the team deserves your participation. Also, consider that the relative costs of speaking up in the moment is more effective and valuable than having to nurse wounds or regrow body parts later.

If you work with a sea cucumber: I find speaking with reclusive teammates is most beneficial   in a 1:1 or smaller setting. If I see that a colleague has taken a brunt of tension-filled meeting and not spoken up, I try to draw them out of their tendency of self-sacrifice to encourage them communicate their ideas and perspectives.

Grizzly Bears: One of the few animals with no natural-born predators, I think we can all learn from the grizzly bears to be a more effective team.  Unarmed, even a clever human can’t beat the bear.  She doesn’t have to inflict, hide in the woods, or rise up to scare away people to stay alive, because she is capable of all of those things.  She doesn’t have to be defensive, because she has power.

How we can be more like Grizzly Bears: We shouldn’t lead with our defense mechanisms, those are there to protect us at the expense of others – the exact opposite of teamwork. We should strive to be our true, higher selves by using our defenses for good so the best ideas come to the forefront.

By recognizing our own biomimicry characteristics, we can combine our natural strengths to harness the confidence of the cobra, the thoughtfulness of the turtle, the healing powers of the sea cucumber, and the knowledge of the eel. By leveraging our defensive tendencies into powerful tools, we can be a team of grizzly bears — working together to influence others, to excite change, to achieve greatness.

This article was originally published by Talent Culture.

Collaborate

On things big and small.  With team mates you have known forever or those you have just met.  Don't delay in collaborating.

Celebrate

It was great to celebrate with the students, mentors, and sponsors of Marathon Scholars, this weekend and see the amazing potential that is being realized in these young scholars!

The big thing and the small things.  The unexpected and the planned.  The new and the old.  Don't delay in celebrating all that is great today!

Trust Illustrated

Yesterday, I posted some thoughts about trust and then saw this TEDx video in which two talented artists, Jack and Jill Maxwell, combine talents to show us how two faces, four hands, and four feet lead to amazing results when the collaboration is built on mutual trust and respect.  Their trust is revealed in their artwork and the dance of expression.  It is a great illustration of this revelation of trust in action.

Is Trust Build or Revealed?

I recently re-read Patrick Lencioni’s The Five Dysfunctions of a Teambusiness fable and was reminded of the foundational importance of trust among a team.  His definition is fairly precise and limited to a belief in the intention of the person (not in their ability or capacity), yet it got me thinking about trust in a more general sense.

We often talk about building trust.  But I wonder if that is the right metaphor at all.  Do we really “build” trust with people?  Or is it more that we reveal the trustworthiness of others in our interactions and in their promises made and kept? 

Some people can never build (or re-build) our trust and others can’t seem to shake our feelings of goodwill, no matter what they do. This led me to another thought.

Is trust not about the other person, and their trustworthiness, at all, but in our own willingness to be trusting?  So, perhaps we don’t build trust at all, but rather we reveal the trust within ourselves.