Can You Afford Your Affordance?

Thaniya Keereepart, who runs the business of TED on apps, recently spoke about the use of design principles to change the way we interact with each other. 

She explained the idea of affordance.  It’s a user design idea that the look of something tells you how to use it.  A door knob or dial tells you to turn.  A button was designed to be pushed.  A handle to be grasped. 

The same could be true of people.  She says that the language we use in an email, the posture we assume in a meeting, and the space we take up in the room can all impact how people interact with us. 

Just like design begins with objectives, if each of us asked ourselves “what do we want?” and “how do I want to come across?” before meetings or presentations, we would likely get better results.

There are dozens of books about executive presence and TED talks about goal setting, language, and power, if you need some inspiration.

Rights vs. Needs

I am hearing a lot of talk of what constitutes basic human rights.  I have heard things like freedom of travel, access to state-of-the-art health care, access to clean water, a safe and comfortable home, basic education, higher education, and voting for political officials all listed as rights.  And it has led me to have some questions?

Is every human need a right?  If human needs for food and water are rights, what about other needs?

I have been told that humans need to laugh.  Is this a right? The freedom to find things funny.  Or do they have the right to have someone else make them laugh.  To pay for other human services, I am taxed.  What if it was demanded that I tell jokes to make my fellow citizens feel better?  Ridiculous, you say.  But this illustrates the perils of making a long list of things and calling them “rights.”

What about the need for safety?  Is that a right?  What is the role of the individual in this, if they engage in risky behaviors?  Safety is both a reality and a perception that spans a great deal of arenas from seat belts to street lamps.

What about sex?  Is it a need?  Is that need a right?  When does one person’s right to satisfy a need impact another’s rights?  How does one person’s right to sex conflict with others’ right to safety?

What about privacy?  Is it a right?  Clearly we don’t believe this in practice, because I think there are laws against not giving your children social security numbers or keeping them out of school (of some type) which requires them to have certain personal details disclosed.  So, in this case the right to welfare services and public education are in conflict with our right to privacy?  We give up privacy all the time (some saying effectively killing the whole idea of privacy), in exchange for convenience, services, or even safety. 

What about property ownership?  Our economy is based in no small part on the sanctity of property ownership, but what can be owned?  This has been debated for centuries and we rightly settled that you can’t own people (which was accepted for an unacceptable number of millennia and still is in some places and is more common in developed countries than we want to admit).  But we can own plants, farms, livestock, and pets.  We can own real property and equipment.  We can own (even fractional) legal entities that aren’t really alive, like corporations.  We can own contractual rights to thing that we don’t own (like stock options, etc.).  Are all these rights?  So, does that mean these things are needs?  Do we have a need to own things?  And whose job is it to satisfy that need?  Do you need to be given things or do you have the right to earn them?

For a whole host of reasons, humans need to be treated well by our parents.  We need to be fed, spoke to, and taught how to function in the world.  It’s a need.  Is it a right?  We act like it is with child protective services, the foster care system, and child protection laws (all good things).  So, if it is a right for kids, does it become an obligation for parents?  In order to drive, you have to prove that you have the ability to not be a harm to others and that you have the means (insurance at least) to drive.  Because people have the right to be safe as pedestrians and other drivers.  But the same isn’t true of parenting.  A parent’s right to making choices can be in direct conflict to their kids’ right to safety and a host of human rights.

We all have the right (mostly) to manage our own reproduction and so much has been written about this recently in the news.  But that right has consequences.  Where does right end and privilege begin if people are horrible parents and infringe upon the rights of their off-spring?

Regarding the right to your own body, what about exercise?  Our bodies certainly need it.  But is it the freedom to exercise that is our right or should we mandate exercise the way we do other things (i.e., like school attendance or lunch breaks for hourly workers). 

You see what I mean.  This “rights” versus “needs” is tricky.  And it is further complicated by the fact that we live in an interdependent community. 

Just like we need to be careful calling “wants” “needs” and confusing the ideas, I feel like we need to take the same caution with “rights” and “needs.”  Maybe, all we have the right to in the end is the freedom to satisfy our own needs in a way that doesn’t diminish others’ rights to satisfy their needs.  This all sounds good enough, but it is very difficult in practice.  Especially, in a world where shocking headlines of “rights violations” can keep citizens from thinking critically about the implications of a society of having so many rights and where they conflict in practice.

The Difference Between Happiness and Joy

It’s like the difference between a 2 dimensional drawing and a 3 dimensional one. 

It’s richer.  More realistic.  And harder to achieve.

On Experience

“Information is pre-digested experience.  Experience is messy, wasteful, and takes time.” - Chris Dede, Harvard

Lost and Found

Shel Silverstein was a childhood favorite of our family and some of his poems have taken on deeper meaning as I have gotten older.  In light of the changes underway in my life and career, one of his poems has inspired one of my own - a parallel poem about losing and finding.

Losing Pieces by Shel Silverstein

  Talked my head off.

  Walked my tail off.

  Cried my eyes out.

  Walked my feet off.

  Sang my heart out.

  So you see,

  There's really not much left of me.
 

Finding Me by Jennifer Davis

  Found community in conversation.

  Marshalled courage in work.

  Discovered gratitude in tears.

  Uncovered strength in the journey.

  Expressed joy in the song.

  So you see,

  In losing pieces, I may find me.

Photo credit: Randy Y

This article originally appeared in LinkedIn Pulse.

Body Blows Versus Body Surfing

There is a fine difference between taking a body blow by an incoming wave and body surfing.  The waves are the same.  The environment is the same.  The difference is your position to the wave. 

The Shade of the Decade

You can tell when a photo or video is from the 1970’s.  Like the leather goods of the period, the photos have a sepia tint.  Earthy, brown tones rule.  Due to the aging of the film development materials or the state of video capture science of the time, these pages particularly don’t age well and have a distinctive look.

It makes me wonder what the shade of this decade will be when we reflect on it 40 years from now.

Patience Equals Mastery

Singer/songwriter Sara Bareilles, in her book “Sounds Like Me,” talked about the music making process.

“I have learned over the years that ‘not knowing’ is part of the beauty of making music, and that vocabulary is important, but not crucial in communication.  Only patience is crucial in communication.  Recording is exploration.  You take a piece of music and excavate, searching for the shape of the song wants to take in the moment.  You use wonderful musicians, producers, and engineers who help you navigate those waters and hopefully also help you remember that it doesn’t have to feel precious or scary.  You try things that don’t work as you hunt for what does.  And sometimes you even find it.”

Life is a bit like that.  Learning anything is an act of faith and mastery is an act of patience.
 

The Rate of Change

I remember talking to my grandpa about the amount of change he had seen in his life, which spanned the center of the 1900’s.  He would tell me about the novelty of plastic bags (where you could see what was inside without opening the bag – crazy!) and freeways (they overlapped each other just like a Buck Rogers’ cartoon).  Fast forward to 2017 and the pace of change is just that: fast forwarding.  Futurist Maurice Conti predicts that in the next 20 years, there will be more change to our work than in the last 2,000 years.
 

How Leaders Can Promote Privacy, Safety and Truth

We are in a transition of truthfulness. Technology has changed the way we think about what’s real and what’s been modified – creating blurry lines between perceptions and reality.

For example, credit card “safety” no longer includes a traditional pillar of safety – privacy. Credit card safety is now achieved through predictive analytics and constant monitoring of purchases; quite the opposite of privacy.

Technology has modified how we perceive safety with car services – for many of us, a navigation and tracking system like the ones found in popular ride-sharing services makes us feel safer than a taxi driver who has passed a background safety check. It is hard to determine which is the more authentic version of safety.

Another example of how technology has modified the truth is photo filters. With the touch of a button, a photo can easily be manipulated and shared with millions of people. While a flower crown or a puppy face is a fun addition for social media pictures, what happens when filtered photos are presented as real and passed around social media channels, gaining legitimacy with every click, like and share? Combined with our ever-decreasing attention spans and memories that are increasingly dependent on the content we share via social media, and photo filters become a variation on reality, an inch further from an authenticity.

As we move away from privacy and authenticity and become easily modifiable, we lose the honesty and benefits of being honest – trust, reliability, loyalty. Without honesty, companies lose their personal connection to buyers, their internal teams are not efficient, and their business partnerships don’t last. Loyalty becomes obsolete. As business leaders, it is our responsibility to encourage truth so that honesty is a core value to our internal team and our customers.

How can we encourage honesty within our organization? By removing the pitfalls that distort reality and creating opportunities for genuineness.

Create a safe place

I don’t mean an office that meets required occupational safety standards, I mean an environment that is a safe place for people to learn and grow in their roles. Encourage colleagues to share their mistakes, how they overcame the mistake and the lessons they learned. Help teammates teach each other by encouraging them to provide constructive feedback in a productive way. Focus on problem solving, and not blaming individuals, to help the team develop integrity. As the leader, it is also important for you to disclose your own mistakes and lessons learned to help the team recognize that mistakes as learning opportunities and not punishments.

Empower employees

People feel more empowered when they are trusted. Give your team assignments and deadlines, time to work and the ability to ask questions, then give them space to do their job. Eliminating micromanagement practices help employees feel  respected and motivated to complete their work while building pride and integrity.

Do not make promises that can be broken

Your words have tremendous value, so don’t sacrifice them. As a business leader, you have the knowledge and experience to anticipate potential problems. Review business plans with a watchful eye on timing and pricing, guarantees and other promises customers will count on. Set realistic expectations with your internal team about promotions, raises and bonuses. Do not give lip service to the executive team. Breaking promises, resetting expectations and over committing leads to disappointment, which deteriorates trust and your words lose their value and your reputation as reliable.

Don’t sacrifice values

Honesty is perhaps best tested in crisis. Leading with honesty and truthfulness to do the right thing, even if it’s extra work or the outcome is intimating. If the crisis is handled with honesty, the virtue of honesty will be stronger than ever when its resolved. If you try to cover up the crisis, a downward spiral of dishonesty and lies will begin.

Be transparent

This doesn’t mean disclose classified or time-sensitive information, but be upfront in a timely, open manner. If the product is delayed, be truthful about when it will be delivered. If a service is cancelled, offer a reliable alternative. If expectations for a product or service can’t be met, don’t try to conceal the situation. Challenges will be overcome, but an untrustworthy reputation is nearly impossible to overcome. Being transparent creates a culture of honesty where rumors cannot thrive and truthfulness raises to the top.

Be consistent

One of the most obvious indicators of untruthfulness is inconsistency. As Mark Twain said “if you tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.” While important aspects can be tailored to each audience/group, putting truthfulness at the forefront of every conversation will leave no room for doubt. Consistency is a key aspect of building and maintaining trust.

Be authentic

When you think about mentors and leaders that have resonated with you the most, you will likely notice a common theme – the most aspirational people we encounter have shown us their true selves. Be that relatable person for your team; transparent and filter-free without pretense or ulterior motives.

In our pursuit of honesty, we can help create more defined lines between perceptions and reality. We develop into a more trust-worthy company, which helps build customer loyalty and in turn, helps our products and services succeed.

This article was originally posted on Leaders In Heels: Career Lessons.

Recipe for a Career: is it a main dish or side vegetable?

As a student and practitioner of career planning, I am always in search of the definition of a successful career.  What enables success and how is it defined?

I was reading Amy Poehler’s book, Yes Please, recently and stumbled across her brilliant definition. 

"Career is the stringing together of opportunities and jobs.  Mix in public opinion and past regrets.  Add a dash of future panic and a whole lot of financial uncertainty.  Career is something that fools you into thinking you are in control and then takes pleasure in reminding you that you aren't.  Career is the think that will not fill you up and never make you truly whole.  Depending on your career is like eating cake for breakfast and wondering why you start crying an hour later." 

I think she touches on something that each one of us has to wrestle with in our careers: is it going to be our life’s main dish (something that defines you) or is it a nutritious vegetable (something you do because you need to)?  Or, for the lucky ones, is it dessert?  Something you choose to do because it is sweet and makes the whole meal better?
 

What Customers Have Taught Me About Being a Leader

Life is an amazing teacher and in business, I have learned more richly from our customers than any other single group.  Here are some of the lessons I have learned.

• “If something is hard for you to explain, it will be hard for others to understand.”  
• “Understand how the customer makes money and how you help them make money and then the sale is yours.”
• “Leadership is as leadership does in front of a customer.”
• “Leadership is about making and keeping promises.”
• “Success in life and in business is about managing expectations.”
• “The customer is always right, according to their perspective.  You won’t be successful convincing a customer they are wrong.  You will only be successful changing their perspective…or having yours changed.”
• “Customer empathy is the start of any great innovation.”
• “No one cares about your program, product, or policy.  They just want their problems solved.”

Motion Sickness: 3 Ways to Survive Change (without losing your head)

All of us have experienced it. The dizziness and disorientation that comes from motion sickness. Either in the backseat of a station wagon, on a boat, or spinning around the yard, there is that familiar and strange sensation of your brain swirling around in your head. Something similar happens in times of change in our professional lives as well. Whether navigating new waters, riding along on a bumpy road, or having circumstances change suddenly, some motion sickness can be hard to avoid.

So, how do you survive change, avoid light-headedness, and emerge on the other side stronger, wiser, and more capable than you began? Here are three principles to apply.

1.     Find your Focus

When I would go out boating as a kid with family friends and started to feel a little wheezy, they would encourage me to set my eyes on a fixed point like the horizon or the nearby shoreline. It helped provide perspective and settle my stomach. The same is true in our work life. In times when the business results or changing processes are like choppy seas, it is good to fix your eyes on the constants of your business: your commitment to customers, your loyalty to the mission, or your cool products. Not everything in the environment is changing and some of what is steady is extremely positive and can keep you grounded even if things are changing.

2.     Hydrate Your Interests

One of the common causes of dizziness is dehydration. To avoid dizziness, they recommend drinking enough water, eating regularly and sleeping soundly. In other words, you can’t neglect your health and expect your body to perform at its peak. Most of us have multiple interests in and beyond work. In times of change it is important to nourish your curiosities. At work, look for ways to learn new skills or expand your contributions. And in your personal life, don’t neglect the things that feed you like hobbies, time with friends, family, or time in reflection or in nature.

3.     Practice Your Flexibility

Have you ever wondered how ice skaters can perform those tight and fast spins on the ice without getting dizzy? Unlike dancers, who can fix their eyes on a single location trick their brain into thinking it is still even though their bodies are moving, ice skaters are moving too fast for that. When the spin stops, why don’t they feel overwhelmingly dizzy and fall to the ground? The answer is a little anti-climactic: they get used to it. Starting small and slow, they build their tolerance. They might still get dizzy, but not enough that the audience would know. You, too, can practice your flexibility and open-mindedness and train yourself not to get disoriented in times of change. It requires some self-awareness, perhaps some self-reflection and opportunities to practice. So, if you find yourself facing change after change, be thankful that you are getting the opportunity to practice.

The most common cause of dizziness is unintended motion. It’s something out of your control and causes your body to move when you haven’t moved it. In times of change, the first thing to go is our own sense of control and that can be disconcerting. But it need not be debilitating. Like the effects of vertigo, most times they are harmless and temporary. We just need to find our feet and proceed forward and the dizziness will pass.

Envy

For where you have envy and selfish ambition, there you find disorder and every evil practice. 

Setting Your Sights When you Have No Sight

I read with interest an article in the Huffington Post that recounted the 1500 meter race at the Rio Paraolympic games.  The top four finishers in the visually impaired category would have beat the Olympic Gold metalist, a very talented Matthew Centrowitz Jr.  Abdellatif Baka, Tamiru Demisse, Henry Kirwa, and Fouad Baka all ran faster than Centrowitz.

The 1500 meter race at the Olympics was very strategic and not necessarily fast.  In fact, Centrowitz was way off his best time and in fact, there are over a dozen high school kids in the US that have ran faster than the time he posted at the Rio Games, but still the achievements of these blind or nearly-blind running is remarkable.

It leaves me with some “what if” questions.

What if these runners had been on the field at the regular Olympic games?  How would they have done?  They certainly were capable of finishing the distance in time.  But without their sight, could they have known their position in the strategic race that left people guessing until the end who would emerge victorious.

How does a blind or visually-impaired runner judge his position on the track?  How does he know if he is in the leading pack or one further back?  How does he pace himself (or herself) in the field that is running that day?  

And what does this have to teach us about the vision and insight we have today about our businesses, products, and projects?  Does having more information make us a better finisher?  Not in all cases. 

I am inclined to agree with Tim Washer speaking at ContentMarketing World who recently concluded “analysis is good, but don’t let it kill a good idea.” At least not all the time.
 

Sustaining Unsustainability isn't Sustainable

Don't fear the unsustainable. If it is unsustainable, it won't sustain. 

The Right to Solve

Before proceeding with a solution, ask yourself the following:

“Do we have enough data to know if customers have a problem that we have a unique right to solve?”

You will save yourself a lot of money and time if you ask this ahead of time and use it as a strategic filter for investment.  If you don’t know why you will win, then you won’t likely win.
 

Blessed Unrest

“There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because it is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique.  And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium, and it will be lost.  The world will not have it.

It is not your business to determine how good it is, nor how valuable, nor how it compares with other expressions.  It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.  You do not even have to believe in yourself or your work.  You have to keep yourself open and aware to the urges the motivate you.  Keep the channel open.

No artist is pleased. [There is] no satisfaction whatever at any time.  There is only a queer, divine dissatisfaction, a blessed unrest that keeps us marching and makes us more alive than the others.” 

                                                              - Martha Graham, to Agnes de Mille,
                                                              as quoted by Sara Bareilles in her book “Sounds Like Me”

5 Things to Learn From Bad Leaders

I saw one of those motivational parody posters once that said, “Mistakes: It could be that the purpose of your life is only to serve as a warning to others.”

I feel that the same can be said of the nightmare managers and bad bosses we have all had in our careers.

One thing that leaders can do to avoid running a company into the ground is let people tell them the truth.

Here are 5 things you can learn from bad leaders.

1. Bad leaders don’t listen

No one sets out to be a bad leader. Even incompetent or emotionally-injured people generally want to do a good job.

And perhaps more often than not, people don’t realize that they aren’t good leaders. Speaking truth to power is difficult and uncomfortable and possibly risky, so people don’t generally tell their managers how they really feel.

If the manager has created an environment where bad news doesn’t get shared, then no one is going to share the news that the leader is bad.

I once asked a CEO boss of mine what was the one thing that leaders could do to avoid running a company into the ground (a time-worn description we have all heard to describe the work of a value-destroying CEO), and he said, “Let people tell you the truth.”

This means creating the right environment of humility and openness, and getting the right people.

2. Bad leaders make bad hires

Bad leaders often hire people who are like them — people who think like them, have similar temperaments, experiences, or even the same alma mater.

Sometimes that works out great because of the comradery and teamwork that develops. But more often, the corner office becomes an echo chamber where new ideas, fresh approaches and alternative views can’t be voiced.

3. Bad leaders don’t fire fast enough

Driven by ego (or naïve optimism that things will miraculously get better for no rational reason), bad leaders don’t like to admit they have made bad hires, and they are more likely to hold onto a poor performer until a lot of damage has been done — not only the opportunity cost to the business or the direct impact of mistakes, but also damage to the credibility of the leader.

4. Bad leaders do the wrong things well

Sometimes leaders can get so fixated on the process, continuous improvement and infrastructure required to scale the business that they forget the value of the business as perceived by their customers. This can lead to the automation of processes that make the company worse.

I have been part of improvement initiatives that assumed the way we were doing something was right and we just had to speed it up or make it less labor intensive, only to find out that it was a waste of time and resources. So we just found a better and faster way of wasting money.

Leaders should know which products make them money, which customers have the best overall lifetime value, and what campaigns or initiatives have delivered the most tangible results in recent times.

5. Bad leaders do the right things poorly

Finally, leaders who rose through the ranks on their technical merits or intellectual prowess might find themselves ill-equipped for the soft-skills part of their job. In his book Emotional Intelligence, author Daniel Goleman outlines why being able to identify and empathize with others is a better predictor of success than IQ.

Bad leaders don’t have the necessary skills to deal positively with conflict, defuse tense situations, provide clear direction in the face of uncertainty, and truly lead.

The good news about these characteristics is that they aren’t set in stone. Being a bad leader isn’t fixed in the stars or determined like a person’s height or eye color. These are things that can be developed and with mentoring, thoughtful consideration and work. If you want to be a good leader, strive for it.

This article was originally posted on The Business Journals.

Impossible and Safe

“A fatherless girl thinks nothing is impossible and nothing is safe.”
– May Sarton as quoted by Gloria Vanderbilt on the documentary she did together with her son Anderson Cooper

If this is true (and thankfully, I don’t have personal experience), what will this mean to our world as so many girls are growing up without fathers in their lives.  More invention.  More innovation.  More paranoia.  More pessimism or more optimism?